Sewing: A Lifelong Friend
(Commissioned dress remake of a vintage one pictured on paper. This was drafted to client’s measurements.)
Sewing has been such a faithful and reliable friend for many, many years. It’s there for me at any time of day, in any moment I have to spare, and in more situations than one might think. It has given me so much to live for and has connected me with communities I may not have otherwise known about, let alone have a personal connection that I have been so lucky to experience. Despite all of the time I have invested into learning about different techniques, there is always more to learn. It is a craft that is almost as old as time and connects me to my mixed heritage in a very fulfilling way. Harnessing the craft has given me a marketable skill that allows me to help many people in my direct community with their clothing alteration needs. In short, sewing is not only my best friend but also, my superpower.
We first became friends when I learned how to keep my hands busy with counted-cross stitch projects. All it took was for my mother to teach me how to make a silly-looking Daffy Duck from the Looney Tunes and I became completely obsessed. Fast forward to exploring my identity through many different looks during high school while simultaneously having my mind blown by the delicious creations found between the pages of fashion magazines like Elle, Interview, W, and so on! This was during the tail-end of Jean-Paul Gautier’s reign with Dior and Alexander McQueen’s rise to the heavens. How marvelous to learn that clothes allowed me to be anyone I could ever dream of. Our family’s limited finances stopped me from acquiring name brands, but it couldn’t stop my imagination. When ripped jeans became trendy again, I didn’t need to spend $90 on a new pair from the mall and instead just shredded some that I snagged from the thrift store for $8. Sure, I could only feign rabidly over the diamond-encrusted skull brooch from the pages of the magazine. And in the meantime, I’d just stitch my own skull with sequins and beads. While I was an angsty teenager, my mom took classes at the local community college where she discovered that they offered classes on clothing construction and even had a fashion club. Despite disagreeing about everything during those years, we could both agree that I would enjoy being a part of this. To this day, I am blown away by her understanding and encouragement to follow this path for expressing my creativity.
By learning how to read sewing patterns and manipulate materials to make tangible what only I could see in my mind’s eye, an entirely new reality was made available to me. I developed skills that allowed me to create new items I had never seen before. I could also look to the past and pull lost looks back from the dead! Sewing an outfit from start to finish truly feels like performing some sort of magical illusion. I learned that I could tell a story using color, shapes, materials, music, and more. I can’t quite explain the uncontainable pleasure of finding some gorgeous fabric, putting in the time and effort to make a garment that can be worn, and then getting to wear that piece over and over until either it falls apart or you gain/lose weight. Throughout this pandemic, when all of the in-person contact with my real-life corporeal friends had to end, sewing was there for me more than ever. I was so fortunate to have this reliable friend to slow down and spend time with again.
See, even before the lockdowns restricted our movements and trapped us inside of our homes, I had gained a few pounds. It doesn’t sound like a lot but when found in the right places, my clothes just didn’t fit the same as they had before. As we all know, shopping was restricted to ordering our items online and trying things on at home. While we were all sitting around, more weight was gained. After the second round of buying myself some new pants, I said enough to all of this! I needed to confront my fears of truly seeing my current body’s dimensions and find a way to make peace with this new shape that I lived in so that I could feel good in my clothes again. I gathered my dimensions, searched my patterns and books for something that could be easy to wear, adjustable, & cute. I found a pattern for a fun summer dress that had a drawstring at the waist that was perfect. I calculated the amount of fabric I would need, browsed my stash, decided to go for it with this vintage calico I had been hoarding, & made myself the dress! What a wonderful friend to help me through such a difficult time. Everything worked out just right and when I wear this dress out in public, I get so many compliments. My friend at work even said the nicest statement the other day by saying, “I could tell you made that dress because you can’t find anything that nice in the stores today.”
Clothes have this unbelievable power to invoke such long-lasting feelings and connect us in ways we can’t fathom. They are the daily costumes we wear to get through our difficult lives. My parents divorced when I was very young, at 2 years old, so I didn’t see my dad that often over the course of growing up and he has since passed away. However, after I began showing an interest in sewing, he told me all about my grandmother (his mother) and how much she likes to sew. This gave us a topic to connect on when many others had not worked. He was even able to send me some items that she had made that I will forever treasure. On my mother’s side, she has always talked about her grandmother’s dress boutique and how much it was loved by everyone in town. How all of the girls would shop there for their prom dresses and how fun it was to help her unbox new inventory. My dad immigrated to the United States from South Korea to go to college where he met my very American mother who is of English and Irish descent. I’ve never met either of these women who impacted their lives so much and yet, if I were somehow able to, I just know we would get along and have a blast talking about clothes.
Despite turning my back on my dreams and not having a wildly successful career in fashion myself, sewing has never left me. I have always continued to work on sewing projects no matter what job my 9 to 5 was. And after keeping this as a personal hobby for so long, I have officially registered my skills as a bonafide business! I’ve networked by word of mouth through my friends and co-workers and have offered my skills in helping them to repair and alter their clothing. It has really taken off this year and has become clear that this is a path that I belong on. The art of clothing repair and alterations seems very much to be a dying one at the ground level despite the very real need to have it around. I love getting to help friends and strangers directly in my community and this is what I mean by having sewing as a superpower. The joy that I get from sewing always feels the same and connects my current adult self to my inner child. Not many things are reliable in this life, but sewing seems like it’s going to be a lifelong friend.
[This essay was originally posted on vocal.media for a competition. Please find me on Yelp under “Biskits Fits & Alterations” or on Instagram @biskitsfits and reference this blog post for a discount on clothing repair or alteration services.]